The Karaoke Night

I am really enjoying writing my blog. I have had many messages from different kinds of people, from other countries, too!! The main thing that people seem to be enjoying is how I'm being pretty honest. I guess I've always been fairly open and honest about how I feel and what I've done. This has been criticised, in the past, mainly by people who do not want to see me hurt, but I have always found my own honesty to be helpful in releasing honesty in others.

So, I've been thinking about my life and the times where I've messed up, and if my sharing them will release others. So, here we go....

After university, I decided to train as a Secondary School Drama Teacher. I chose to study for a PGCE at Chester University College. This course only lasts a year, but very quickly I made friends with the other training teachers on my course. We often socialised together and one evening, we decided to go out and do a bit of karaoke!!! Now, I LOVE karaoke. I get to fully show off and I'm always up for a round of applause!! So, I was ready for a great night out. My friend, Rachel lived with her family in a nearby town, where she also worked part-time in a local pub. We began our evening with a drink in the pub, meeting some of her colleagues and their partners, who seemed to enjoy hanging out there.

I was introduced to a lady called Tina (names have been changed...well, her's anyway.) Tina introduced us to her latest squeeze, Stuart. She was divorced and had three children, but her and Stuart had been together for a"little while". That night, Tina was working until closing time, but Stuart decided to join us for a bit of karaoke. (Why do we call it a "bit of karaoke"? Why not just "karaoke"? Answers on a postcard, please.)

We piled into a couple of taxis and quickly arrived at the club. Drinks were flowing...as they do on a teachers' night out. I sang a couple of songs - my favourite, "Son of a Preacher Man" being one the them, and got lots of applause and rather a lot of attention...from Stuart. Now, he looked a lot like Dean Cain, who is the actor who played Superman in "The New Adventures..." series. So, this guy was rather good-looking. He got up to sing after me and was a very good singer, too. My head had well and truly been turned.

Later on in the evening, after a lot more alcohol, I found myself in this man's arms, enquiring after his girlfriend, Tina. "We split up two weeks ago, but she doesn't want to tell anyone, as she's worried about her reputation. She's a mum and she doesn't want to keep bringing new men into the house. She doesn't want to upset the kids."

I re-joined my friends and we made our way back to Rachel's house. The next morning, I awoke to find Stuart having a cup of tea with my friends, while I spent most of the time rather "under-the-weather" in the bathroom. Rachel offered to drive me and the other girls home. I accepted. Half-way home, and a during a side-of-the-road-vomit-stop, Stuart car caught up with us. He told Rachel not to worry, and that he would drive me home so that she and the others would not need to wait.

Stuart drove me home, carried my bags in and made me a cup of tea and some toast, while I continued to fully experience my hang-over. Stuart didn't go home that night. He stayed by my bed, making food and drink for me, and making me feel so much better. He was very kind and I was overwhelmed by how well he was looking after me.

In fact, for four weeks, Stuart spent every night with me and I fell in love with him. He was strong and sensitive. He played the guitar and sang. He was funny and generous, always driving me about and giving me little gifts. He introduced me to his dad and I brought him home to meet my mum and dad. Everyone loved Stuart. I remember, that as we prepared to leave my parents' house and head back to Chester, I came outside to put my case in his car, only to find him laying under the next door neighbour's car, fixing it!! Stuart seemed to be able to do anything. He knew loads and was always surprising me with his knowledge and experience. He'd met some really interesting people and done some really interesting things.

I really was smitten and it seemed that things couldn't get any better. But it did. I was struggling in my faith at that time, but I was still attending church from time to time. We had talked about my faith and he had encouraged me to go to church and said that he wanted to come, too. He didn't even believe in God!! On the day that he did come to church with me, it was amazing. He sang along during the worship, and listened intently to the sermon. Towards the end of the service, he asked a man to pray with him. After a while, he walked up to the front of the church, and announced that he had given his life to Jesus and become a Christian. "Praise the Lord" he called out, clapping and laughing. I just cried. I felt that this was it for me. I felt that this was God's sign that Stuart and I really were meant to be together.

That night, Stuart asked me to marry him. I was truly scared. I knew that he was deadly serious. I told him that I could not answer him straight away. It was a huge decision and I needed some time. We had only been together for a few weeks and it was a bit too soon.

The next day, I saw my friend, Rachel. I told her about Stuart's proposal. She immediately looked down and let out a deep sigh. "Sal, he's still seeing Tina," she said. I thought that she was joking. "Did you see him on Thursday afternoon?" she asked. I thought carefully and remembered that he had been at a meeting over lunchtime and then had picked me up at the end of my school day. "Yes, I did."
Rachel smiled gently. "Tina says that she was house-hunting with Stuart on Thurday and they had a viewing at 1pm."

I felt sick. I was so confused. I continued to listen to Rachel and all of the details about how he had been seeing Tina in the mornings after dropping me at school and that they had been sleeping together. Eventually, Rachel stopped. She said how sorry she was, and I knew that she was telling the truth. I called my mum that afternoon. She listened and then told me that she needed to tell me something. After we had left their house, mum had tidied up in my brother's room, where Stuart had stayed. She discovered that my brother's birthday money had gone. After this, my dad had made some enquiries about Stuart's line of work. He was in sales. Dad called the company in question, only to find out that they had not even heard of Stuart. "I think he's got some problems, Sal. I don't think he's all that he seems. We didn't want to hurt you, but we just had a funny feeling about him."

I ended my relationship with Stuart that evening. I asked him questions and asked him to explain why Tina had said what she's said, why the company did not know him, if he knew anything about my brother's money. At first, he laughed and said that everyone was wrong, and it was all a mistake. Then he became quite angry, saying that Tina was trying to ruin his life. Then, he cried. by this time, I had spoken to Tina, and she and I had apologised to each other. I had also packed up all of Stuart's things. I told Stuart to leave my house. I told him that I could not accept his behaviour. I also reminded him of his announcement to the church. Just before he left, I said, "You can cheat on me, lie to me, steal from me, but you DO NOT mess with God."

He left and I did not see him again. He did call me once, saying tht he was on a Christian retreat trying to sort himself out. I don't know where he is now, but I do hope that he is being truthful and real with whoever he is sharing his life with.

So, you see, sometimes we do things, against our better judgement. Either through "beer goggles" or because we are lonely, or simply because we want to see the good in people. Whatever the reason is, we all get it wrong sometimes.