My amazing mum

I couldn't spend much more time without needing to tell you all about my mum. My mum's name is Valerie Ann Pocock. She's known to her friends as "Val", to my brother and I as "Mum", and to my children as "Nana".

My mum had a great start. She was born in London to May Louisa Stokes Hayes and Charles William Hayes. Her older brother, Alan, was already 9 years old when she was born. As a young child, her family moved to Bracknell, in Berkshire where she went to Sandy Lane Primary School (where my dad also attended, and eventually my brother and I also.) Mum went to Wick Hill School, now known as Garth Hill College and has then had her first job as a secretary at Pennicotts Estate Agents in Bracknell.

At the age of 17, she met my dad, Terry, at work. They "courted" for 2 years and became engaged when Mum was 19. Mum and Dad were very trendy Mods and liked each others' clothes!! When Mum was 23, in 1970, they got married at Holy Trinity Church, Bracknell. Mum made her own wedding dress from a Vogue pattern. Her dress had a goose-feather-lined hood and flared cuffs. They went to Torquay on honeymoon.

Three months later, Mum's dad, my grandad, Charlie, sadly died. He had suffered with pancreatic cancer. Mum and Grandad had been very close. Grandad was very intelligent and had enjoyed reading and debating. He was calm and kind and fought for injustice. He had been a member of the Communist Party, before Communism failed. Grandad believed that every man should be given a chance. He enjoyed sport and the theatre and was one of life's popular people. He was very grounded. Mum learnt a lot from her dad and to this day, having been born after he died, I am so very sad that I never got to meet him.

Mum and Dad waited 7 years after they got married to have me. Mum stayed at home with me until I started school. At that point she took on a job, but found it hard-going not being "Fully" available for me. So, she decided to stop work and be at home full-time. I have childhood memories of my mum. I remember playing at the top of the stairs, the warm sun shining through the window, as my mum mopped the front doorstep and listened to Jimmy Young's morning programme on Radio 2. I remember Mum carrying me out from the car after long journeys where I'd fallen asleep. I remember the smell of her perfumed fake fur coat that she always wore when she went out for dinner with Dad. Mum throwing my wellies at me accross the garden, after I laughed at her falling over in the snow!!

As a teenager, Mum was great. We got on really well. At the age of 14, many of my friends spent nights out, in the woods, drinking and "getting off" with each other. This was something I did not want to do, and yet I was always invited. Mum told me to use her as an excuse. "Just tell them that I won't let you. I don't mind you blaming me." You see, my mum knew when I couldn't handle things alone. She helped me to survive the "big scary world".

My mum was understanding and realistic. She encouraged me to take responsibility for myself, with out pushing me out of the nest before I was ready.

I will never forget one of the best things that my mum has ever said to me:
"I'm not your friend, I'm your mum."
At the time, I didn't understand and found this annoying. How could she be so uncool? But gradually, I became grateful for my mum being just that: My Mum. Now, she is one of the most amazing friends that I have. We talk easily and laugh together. I look forward to the time when we have enough money to go off on holiday together - just me and Mum.

Mum was my birthing partner when I had Roo. She supported me during long night-feeds. She and Roo have a really special relationship where sometimes only she can get through to him. I know that I can trust Mum and be myself with her. We do not always agree, but we always love and respect one another. Mum makes good choices and she is very wise. Many of my friends have gone to her for advice and she actively seeks out younger women to mentor and love.

Mum has no fear of others. She doesn't worry and or concern herself with "what tomorrow will bring." She has a very strong faith and a great relationship with God. Every morning she gets up early to pray and read her Bible.

Mum is a great encourager and my greatest cheerleader. She makes the best trifle and Honeyed Beef Casserole. I love her roast dinners. Mum stills smells lovely every day, and she is really beautiful.

Mum, if you're reading this, thank you. You are wonderful and I love you very much.